I’ve been hard of hearing my whole life. From a young age I’ve had operations on my ears for grommets and reconstruction which consists of Myringoplasty, Ossiculoplasty and Tympanoplasty. I’ve suffered, and still do, with awful ear infections to the point of being kept in hospital for 10 days on a drip with mastoiditis.
Whilst it is unpleasant to have ear aches and pains and the hassle that comes with going to the doctors at least once a month for some kind of antibiotics, I feel that what I experience around me is the most draining.
So I’ve been suffering with an ear infection for the last few weeks. I went to the doctors to get some antibiotics, they said they were going to give me drops, I told them they don’t work but they didn’t take my advice and gave them to me anyway. Not surprisingly, they didn’t work as I was back in the doctors surgery 7 days later asking for the antibiotics which they gave, but they haven’t gotten rid of the infection so I will need to go back.
FYI my colleagues are all aware that I am hard of hearing, and most of my days are filled with asking people to repeat themselves, and whilst most people are lovely and speak a bit louder and make an effort for me to hear them, others aren’t as giving.
Today at work a colleague said something to me. I normally can’t hear this person as they hardly ever look at me when they speak, and I strong rely on lip reading so this is a real struggle. This person usually says “Oh don’t worry” which does bother me. I feel like I am being left out of the conversation or missing out on learning something new, but I get this response from most people so over the years I’ve learned to accept that I’m going to miss out on some things. But today, this person said “I just won’t talk to you anymore”. I’d like to say here that we get on so well, they are a good laugh and fun to be around. But to hear this today really upset me.
The first time they said whatever it was, I asked them to repeat themselves as they had their head down and turned away from me, they then lifted their head and said it again, but still not looking at me. When I asked them to repeat for the second time, they said “Don’t worry”. I responded in a friendly manner with “I can’t hear you when you look away from me and speak quietly. Why would you say something to me if it’s not important. What did you say?”. And that’s when they said “I just won’t talk to you anymore.”
I’m shocked to hear that from someone who I consider to be my friend. Whilst I am leaving this job soon and starting a career elsewhere, I’d still like to stay in contact with some of the people I work with. I’ve never thought of myself to have a disability. And whilst the problems with my ears have stopped me from doing quite a few things, the only thing that has bothered me this much has been not being able to swim as much as I used to.
I wouldn’t class this as discrimination as this person isn’t hindering me from doing my job, but I do see it as rude, thoughtless and disrespectful. I hope that at least one person who reads this post takes away the message that those who are hard of hearing do get fed up when they have to keep asking people to repeat themselves because not only is it annoying for both parties, but it can be a little embarrassing when after the third time, you still can’t hear them. So please be patient. Speak a little louder, make the effort to look at someone when you’re speaking and try not to show your frustration with them. We are trying just as hard as you to be involved in the conversation, and we are just as frustrated.
I'm going to add some links below to those who are interested in finding out more.
Have a good day!
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