The Struggles Of Being Hard Of Hearing

I’ve been hard of hearing my whole life. From a young age I’ve had operations on my ears for grommets and reconstruction which consists of Myringoplasty, Ossiculoplasty and Tympanoplasty. I’ve suffered, and still do, with awful ear infections to the point of being kept in hospital for 10 days on a drip with mastoiditis.

Whilst it is unpleasant to have ear aches and pains and the hassle that comes with going to the doctors at least once a month for some kind of antibiotics, I feel that what I experience around me is the most draining.

So I’ve been suffering with an ear infection for the last few weeks. I went to the doctors to get some antibiotics, they said they were going to give me drops, I told them they don’t work but they didn’t take my advice and gave them to me anyway. Not surprisingly, they didn’t work as I was back in the doctors surgery 7 days later asking for the antibiotics which they gave, but they haven’t gotten rid of the infection so I will need to go back.

FYI my colleagues are all aware that I am hard of hearing, and most of my days are filled with asking people to repeat themselves, and whilst most people are lovely and speak a bit louder and make an effort for me to hear them, others aren’t as giving.

Today at work a colleague said something to me. I normally can’t hear this person as they hardly ever look at me when they speak, and I strong rely on lip reading so this is a real struggle. This person usually says “Oh don’t worry” which does bother me. I feel like I am being left out of the conversation or missing out on learning something new, but I get this response from most people so over the years I’ve learned to accept that I’m going to miss out on some things. But today, this person said “I just won’t talk to you anymore”. I’d like to say here that we get on so well, they are a good laugh and fun to be around. But to hear this today really upset me.

The first time they said whatever it was, I asked them to repeat themselves as they had their head down and turned away from me, they then lifted their head and said it again, but still not looking at me. When I asked them to repeat for the second time, they said “Don’t worry”. I responded in a friendly manner with “I can’t hear you when you look away from me and speak quietly. Why would you say something to me if it’s not important. What did you say?”. And that’s when they said “I just won’t talk to you anymore.”

I’m shocked to hear that from someone who I consider to be my friend. Whilst I am leaving this job soon and starting a career elsewhere, I’d still like to stay in contact with some of the people I work with. I’ve never thought of myself to have a disability. And whilst the problems with my ears have stopped me from doing quite a few things, the only thing that has bothered me this much has been not being able to swim as much as I used to.

I wouldn’t class this as discrimination as this person isn’t hindering me from doing my job, but I do see it as rude, thoughtless and disrespectful. I hope that at least one person who reads this post takes away the message that those who are hard of hearing do get fed up when they have to keep asking people to repeat themselves because not only is it annoying for both parties, but it can be a little embarrassing when after the third time, you still can’t hear them. So please be patient. Speak a little louder, make the effort to look at someone when you’re speaking and try not to show your frustration with them. We are trying just as hard as you to be involved in the conversation, and we are just as frustrated.

I'm going to add some links below to those who are interested in finding out more.

Have a good day! 

Communication tips 

Working with people who are deaf or hard of hearing

Time For Change

Never have I ever been more ready to move out of my family home, and become independent. 

Everyone is off to university now, I'm still looking for a job in something I love doing but in the meantime, I'm shift working at the local pub/restaurant. I never really get to see my family as we cross paths everyday and that's also something Id like to change in my future career. 

Since doing GCSE's, I made the decision not to go to uni, and this was confirmed when I started my A Levels. Most of the teachers at my sixth form college were very much up for universities and would drill it into your head at any given opportunity. Now I've seen what my peers are going to study, I am 100% happy with my decision not to go (yet!!). I am very jealous of the places they're going and and the friends they'll make, but in 3 or 4 years time they'll come back home with a degree, a £50,000+ debt and no job. 

I feel that in this day, experience is key. I've heard many times of people going to interviews and hearing "yes you have a degree, but show us that you can do it". 

I feel that setting goals in the key to planning your future. I want to have a secure job and be moved out by the end of November this year. But if this fails, and I still haven't got a job by next year, I will have to apply for uni. Not for the safety of a degree, but to add to my long list of experiences. 

Hopefully everything will start to look up now, and I will get to finally be in a job and an area that I am truly happy in. 

The Perfect Night In

Whether you're stressed, tired or simply in need of a night in to relax, then you have come to the right place. Needing to relax is a necessity to getting on with a week of school, work or college otherwise you'll make yourself feel absolutely dreadful, and no one needs that really, do they?

Bubbles..

Okay, so first things first, a nice hot bath will automatically chill you out. Bubbles, candles, the lot! I personally recommend taking a trip to Lush to purchase magical bath bombs, soaps and melts to really relax, and with their massive selection, I'm sure you'll be in the shop for a while. Lush is also an advocate for the ban of animal testing,  so you can feel like you've done a good deed with helping out an amazing cause, as well as feeling good in yourself. Or if you're not a bath person, they also do amazing shower gels and soaps to get the same relaxing effect.



After your bath, get into your comfiest and warmest pajamas that you own. There is nothing worse than sitting on the sofa feeling uncomfortable and cold in what you're wearing. And another thing, remove your makeup and find a nice face mask to wear, they don't have to be expensive either, Superdrug and Boots do them for less than a £1 each, but if you're willing to spend a bit more, then Lush also do them.

Food

Pick food that you enjoy! Whether you fancy a healthy chicken salad or you want to order a takeout, food is always something that will change your mood. Pick a snack for the evening, a bowl of popcorn, some Malteasers or a fruit salad. Again, its whatever you feel comfortable with.

Time To Chill..

After a nice soak and getting comfy in bed or on the sofa, you can settle down and plan your evening. You can watch some episodes of a series on Netflix. My recommendations would be Breaking Bad, Pretty Little Liars, Gavin and Stacey or Orange Is The New Black. You can watch a film to keep you entertained or read a book that you love, all with a nice bowl of snacks next to you.

Relaxing is a vital part of getting on with your week, so why not make the most of it!

How To: Afternoon Tea

Afternoon tea is one of those rituals that everyone wants to have a go at hosting at some point in their lives. It's a polite way to stuff your face with sandwiches and cake and not feel guilty about it because you weren't sat at home on the sofa surrounded with empty packets and crying over a soppy film. 

This post will show you how you can host a vintage afternoon tea, and not spend too much either!

Center Piece

Every table must have a center piece. Some people choose to use the cake stand as the center piece but you can always be a bit original, due to it being winter, my family decided to use a winter themed wooden plaque with little candle pots and holly to make the tables look cosy. 

You can collect pots from charity shops or keep empty jars to put candles in to add that extra bit of attention to the table. With the empty jars, you can cover them in PVA glue and stick scrap pieces of tissue paper on at a very low cost which will add different colours to coordinate the rest of the table with. Obviously the holly is very seasonal for this time of year, so be inventive! Decorate with flowers or ornaments!

Crockery 

I find that the best looking afternoon tea displays are the ones where nothing matches, everything down to tea cups, saucers, milk jugs and tea pots! It adds that Alice In Wonderland twist to it, which nearly everyone thinks of when 'Afternoon Tea!' is mentioned!

Again, charity shops are your best bet at finding cheap and cheerful crockery, and even better, none of it will match! Or if you have elderly family members, you'll find that they may have old vintage tea sets which will absolutely fit the style.

Also from the good old charity shops, you can find sheets with patterns and colours to throw over the table as table cloths with personalise each table, or you may have your own. 

   

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Finally, FOOD! Which of course is the best bit. Afternoon tea's have kept the traditional cucumber sandwiches and scones to satisfy the eaters, but that's never enough. Sandwich fillers such as ham, egg, cheese and chicken give people an option as not everyone will like whats available. Also make sure you cut them into finger sandwiches, that's an absolute must! Cakes including fruit cake, lemon drizzle, scones, chocolate sponge and victoria sponge also give people a variety and its guaranteed that there will be no waste! 

I hope this How To helps you to get an idea of how you can experiment with your afternoon tea!